Our Irish Setter, Lady, was raised in a tire shop. If you know
anything at all about Irishers, you know that they are vengeful
creatures who get angry if left alone for what they consider is too
long a time. Well, that sets up the story--my husband left Lady in
the shop one night, with the entire building to herself. When he went
in the next morning, she had bitten through EVERY air line in the
shop! My husband turned the main power switch on and they were
flipping around in the air like snakes. Lady stood beside him,
watching, and biting her lips in consternation.
Or how about the time she ran up to the CEO of a major tire company
and ever so nicely jumped up and put her paws on his shoulders and
stood quite demurely right there, looking into his face oh! so
And then there's the time a neighbor gave us a rather new couch for
the office of the tire shop, and Lady, again left alone in the
building for what she thought was entirely too long, ate the entire
middle of the couch.
Ah, yes! There's also the time that my husband stopped the car to let
her out, and rather than simply relieving herself of Nature's need,
she found an opportunity to roll around in what we later determined
was human shit. (Don't ask how we figured that one out.)
Then there's the time she was so happy about riding in the truck that
she wouldn't get out to pee, she wouldn't get out to pee, she wouldn't
get out to pee...oops! She peed right there in the passenger seat
where she was, and looked quite guiltily at my husband while it was
happening, if I remember the story correctly.
Also, she loved to chase rocks (Again, another thing not to ask
about). Some mean-hearted employees knew this about her, and got her
all interested in one particular rock they had. Then they threw it in
a mud puddle, and sure enough, Lady's head went in the puddle and she
came out as the world's first chocolate-coated Setter, but she had
that damned rock!
And one last one--please humor me. She loved to chase rolling tires
almost as much as she loved to chase rocks. One day, a load of tires
came in from a truck that was heading west out of Johnstown,
Pennsylvania, where we lived. Lady got so involved in chasing rocks
through their entire rolling life-span from truck into store, that she
ended up getting locked in the truck. The driver honestly didn't know
she was in there, and none of us knew she was gone until we were
closing up for the day. Finally, we figured out about the shipment,
and hoping and wishing that she was OK and in that truck, we called
the truck's next stop. Sure enough, the company's owner there called
us back about an hour later to say that there was a red dog in the
truck when it came in. My husband drove to Ohio that night to get
that old sack of red bones. In the same car he carried her
poop-covered self home in after the shit-rolling incident.
Thanks for hearing me out. She was the best girl in the world, and we
miss her so much. I just want her back again. She died this past
May, a 14-year-old matriarch mixed with clown right to the very end.